i think i got up on the wrong side of the bed today
so far it seems i'm floating through a dream
(is it weird that weekends do this to me? i'm so hopelessly unproductive by saturday afternoon it's devastating)

i realised how dead my blog has been, hahahaha. and really, it seems surreal to think of the past week and everything that's happened, such as teachers vs prefects dodgeball (that was. epic. really =D) finishing another 1000 piece puzzle in the library (in 3 days this time. it's really a waste of free periods, but meh ><) new batches of yarn that got delivered (yay! now the weather just has to start getting even cooler - surprisingly hot these days ><") being driven home by eddie (nerve-wracking. *cough* no actually it was surprisingly uneventful and normal o.O") a long talk with moo, and stumbling upon something that i probably shouldn't have. perhaps i am too perceptive sometimes. i won't deny that i'm struggling with forgiveness and a non-judgemental acceptance, and i wonder if i'm so full of ire simply because of pride and the desire to be seen as superior. i am far from being impartial, and it's hard to quell the disgust that flares up within me - but maybe, just maybe, it's because of the seemingly blind respect that you command effortlessly. perhaps i'm just jealous that of what you have... and then i'm reminded of who i am and i'm ashamed. but i still can't forgive you.

o.O saturday afternoons do weird things to me. i have english essays to write but all i feel like doing is rambling. and at the heart of it all i'm worried, and shaken. but i know i hold the solution in my hands: faith, and prayer.