And so on the 4th september 2011, I was baptised, and this is my testimony :)

Hi, I’m Elaine. I’ve been fortunate enough to have been brought to church most of my life, but it was only until a few years ago that I started really understanding what the gospel was and what it meant for me. Today I stand here in full assurance of my faith and salvation, because of God’s amazing grace in my life.

Throughout the past 18 years I’ve attended 6 different schools and moved houses at least 8 different times. I think around late primary school I started noticing that I was different because everyone around me knew one another for so much longer. I was jealous that I was always the outsider. I was so conscious of how others perceived me, and I tried so hard to be nice and agreeable so that people would like me and accept me into their friendship circles. My behaviour was controlled by the expectations of the people around me, and I was afraid to contradict others even when I had a different opinion. When I went to church, I said that I believed in Jesus because I knew it was what I was expected to believe. I remember learning all the memory verses from Sunday School so that I would be praised for being a good girl, but I never considered what the verses actually meant for me. Outside of church, I was just like everyone else – I even tried to make myself more like the people around me so that I could fit in and be accepted.

Four years ago, after moving back to Australia from Singapore, I started coming to this church with my family, and I attended the Hub, the Sunday morning bible study for youth. One Sunday at the Hub, Jacqui, one of the youth leaders, shared her vision for our generation of Christians. She talked about a generation whose “mouths speak of God’s unconditional love and who tell others how about great God is”. At that time I was at Carlingford High School and it just so happened that the following week we started learning about the Big Bang Theory in science. During lunch time one day, my group of friends started discussing how they believed the universe came into being, and they asked me for my opinion. I was going to agree with them that the Big Bang Theory was the most logical explanation, but then I remembered what Jacqui said. I felt guilty, and I thought, no, I need to act like a better Christian, so I told my friends I believed that God created the universe. To my surprise, even though some of them debated with me about it, they were genuinely interested in my opinions. I was actually more included in conversations for the next few days because they all wanted to hear what I had to say!

Because of this, I did a lot of research and I found that there is an enormous amount of evidence to support the idea that God created the universe. This really challenged me because it was the first time I realised that what I had been hearing in church was actually true and not just traditions or ideas that inspire us to be better people with a meaningful purpose in life. I started to realise that being a Christian wasn’t just about fitting in to the church community or simply acting in certain ways to appear to be a good person.

Two years ago, I transferred to James Ruse High School and started going to ISCF, the Christian group there. I was confronted by how different I was to the people at ISCF, even though I called myself a Christian like they did. Their Christianity wasn’t just about being good or knowing the bible very well, but it was about actively seeking to become more like Jesus in character. I saw a passionate Christianity about serving and glorifying God even when it meant defying society’s expectations. I saw students who were willing to give up their personal comfort and time for studying and social activities to lead bible studies and to be trained in God’s word.

In contrast, I saw how self-centred I was, because to me, Christianity was about being good so that God could bless me and give me friends and good grades and a happy life, and outside of church I never prayed or read the bible. I remember the first time I attended one of their lunch time meetings, a girl in my grade, Veronica, came and sat down next to me even though she didn’t know me. It just really struck me, because she could’ve sat with her friends, but she chose to sit next to me and she was just so friendly and welcoming. As the weeks went by I met more and more people at ISCF who were genuinely friendly and loving, not because I had something to offer them, but because I was a sister-in-Christ to them.

All along I’d been trying so hard to make people like me so that I could have more friends, but through ISCF, God opened my eyes to the fact that friendship isn’t something that I can earn by trying to be nice or agreeable. I saw God’s providence in all the close friends that He’s given me, friends who I feel like I’ve known all my life even though I’ve only had a year or two to get to know them. It seemed like God was telling me, “See, because I love you I’ve given you what you want most, to have friends who genuinely love you and accept you as part of their community. And you know what, I’ll give you many more things – all you have to do is trust me!”

When I was in Year 11, I went to KYCK, a youth Christian conference up in the Blue Mountains. At the conference I was convicted by how far I had fallen away from God and the way He calls me to live, and so I prayed a prayer of repentance after the talk by the speaker. I said sorry for turning away from God and prayed that God would help me live according to His will so that I could glorify Him with my life. And over the past two years, God’s provided me with so many experiences and opportunities to grow me in maturity as a Christian, both in understanding of the Bible and of what it really means to follow Jesus as my Lord and Saviour. I truly understand now that I live a life freed from sin, a life in a personal relationship with God because He sent Jesus to die on the cross for my sins, and in Jesus’ resurrection I now have a new life as a child of God.

I wouldn’t say that living life as a Christian has been easier, because there are different struggles and obstacles to overcome. But I look back on the life I used to live, and I see a girl who was insecure, pretentious and hollow inside, despite all her friendships and academic achievements. Now, I’m no longer anxious about fitting in or being successful, but I live a life confident in my identity as God’s beloved daughter, a life that has an unchangeable source of joy and love from God that has helped me overcome many stressful and trying situations. I’ve been repeatedly assured and reassured of God’s very real presence in my life, and although I am still so, so, so far from perfect, I know that God will never forsake me and that He will keep growing me and building me up as a Christian until the day He returns. So yup, that’s my testimony. I’d just like to end by sharing a few of my favourite bible verses:

Romans 8:38-39 “For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord”.

Philippians 4:4, 6-7 “Rejoice in the Lord always, again I will say, Rejoice. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

Finally, Ephesians 3:20-21 “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”